BY AMY FLOWERS UMBLE

Matt Paxton was standing on a 4-foot-tall pile of soiled adult diapers when the house started to shake.

It was an earthquake, and Paxton was pretty sure his life would end in a pile of someone else’s waste. And this was the high point of his life.

Paxton, a cleaning specialist on the A&E reality series “Hoarders,” shared this story and others with University of Mary Washington students and staff on Wednesday night.

On the show, Paxton is one of a handful of organizers and cleaners who help people suffering from extreme hoarding issues. He’s known as the tough one, the guy who doesn’t take any crap from the hoarders.

Figuratively, that is. Literally, he takes a lot of their crap: Old magazines, rotting food, heaps of clothes, animal carcasses and, yes, feces.

At times, he and his crew haul away tons of stuff. But that’s not what fixes the hoarding, Paxton said.

The very first step is called equalizing. And it’s a lot harder than hauling junk.

It starts with a phone call. Paxton calls hoarders before cameras ever roll and spends more than 20 hours with them and their families.

He also limits hiring to ex-convicts and recovering addicts so everyone can relate to the hoarders on some level.

Paxton, a former gambling addict, is upfront about his own past. Sometimes, that helps him bond with hoarders.

He spends the 20 or more hours looking for the very best thing about the hoarder. Then, when he’s standing on a pile of used diapers or dead cats, Paxton can remind himself that there’s more to the hoarder than the hoard.

Hoarders tend to be extremely smart, Paxton said. And nearly all have been through a horrific tragedy. He calls this the trigger, and said that finding it is the key to fixing the problem.

In addition to a cleaning specialist, each hoarder is matched with a therapist. That counselor also works with the hoarder before the first camera arrives on scene. Both therapist and organizer also stick around, if the hoarder agrees, for up to six months after the show ends.

“If they don’t do the therapy, there’s not a chance that house is staying clean,” Paxton said. And a lack of judgment is key to successful therapy. So while he’s tough on the hoarders, Paxton is also empathetic.

He’s best known for once telling a homeless man living in a hoarder’s yard, “We’re all about five decisions away from sh–ting in a bucket.”

The quote became so popular that Paxton titled his weekly podcast “5 Decisions Away.”

It’s a motto that resonates in his own life.

LIFE IS A TOUGH BUSINESS

Paxton graduated from Mary Washington College in 1997 with a degree in business. He got a job as an economist at the Federal Reserve. Within 10 minutes, he knew he’d never last. He quit soon after and bounced around in a few jobs without finding his niche.

Then, 11 years ago, his father died. Paxton reacted with a “2-year bender.”

He gambled compulsively, drank round-the-clock and got high on drugs.

About a year into the bender, he was $40,000 in debt to a bookie. He wound up in a Lake Tahoe ditch, with his nose and ego broken.

He called friends and family for help, and landed a job in Chicago. He gave up gambling but not alcohol. For another year or so, he bounced from job to job, moved to Hawaii, then took an extended hiking trip to Europe.

REBUILDING HIS LIFE

He ended the bender and tried to get his life back together. He started a handful of businesses, selling a special soap for sandals and frozen pizza that came with a prize.

Paxton didn’t succeed. But he did find a passion while volunteering at Comfort Zone, a camp for grieving children. He also found a wife among the other volunteers.

He needed a steady job, so he turned to cleaning really messy houses.

He was making $12 an hour cleaning foreclosures in Baltimore when A&E was creating the show “Hoarders.” Initially, producers wanted Paxton to show them messy houses. But when they met the personable Paxton, they wanted him on the show.

He was at the point of siphoning his lawn mower to get gas for his car. And suddenly he was on TV.

His business, Clutter Cleaners, took off. He’s also written a book and created a popular podcast. He has been featured in The Wall Street Journal and Playboy and on television’s “Good Morning America” and “The View.”

“All of these things started when I was at rock bottom, and I could not find any job anywhere,” Paxton told students at UMW.

He passionately preaches about accepting failure.

“If you never mess up, you’re not learning anything,” Paxton said. “Succeeding sucks, because you’re not learning anything.”

Amy Flowers Umble: 540/735-1973
Email: aumble@freelancestar.com